It's not a shock: Better bandage promotes powerful healing

A new, low-cost wound dressing could dramatically speed up healing in a surprising way. The method leverages energy generated from a patient's own body motions to apply gentle electrical pulses at the site of an injury.

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Blood Pressure Medication Recall – Know The Facts

We’ve grown to be pretty familiar with romaine lettuce recalls or raw meat recalls due to product contamination with bacteria and other pathogens, but it’s important to know that more than just these types of foods can undergo recalls due to a lack of consumer safety. In fact, the United States Food and Drug Administration... View Article

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Antibiotic could protect against neurodegenerative diseases during aging

An antibiotic, minocycline, can increase the lifespan of roundworms by preventing the build-up of proteins during aging, a study reports.

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Skin cancer rates in England far higher than previously thought, according to new database

Data from a newly established UK skin cancer database, the largest of its kind in the world, has revealed that there are over 45,000 cutaneous squamous cell carcinomas every year in England, 350 percent more than previous estimates suggested.

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Researchers regrow hair on wounded skin

By stirring crosstalk among skin cells that form the roots of hair, researchers report they have regrown hair strands on damaged skin. The findings better explain why hair does not normally grow on wounded skin, and may help in the search for better drugs to restore hair growth, say the study's authors.

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Why older women are less healthy than older men

Genes that act late in life could explain why women have poorer health than men in older age, according to new research.

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The potentially deadly bacterium that's on everyone's skin

Forget MRSA and E. coli, there's another bacterium that is becoming increasingly dangerous due to antibiotic resistance -- and it's present on the skin of every person on the planet.

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Researchers regrow hair on wounded skin

By stirring crosstalk among skin cells that form the roots of hair, researchers report they have regrown hair strands on damaged skin. The findings better explain why hair does not normally grow on wounded skin, and may help in the search for better drugs to restore hair growth, say the study's authors.

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Biologists discover an unusual hallmark of aging in neurons

Biologists have discovered that oxidative damage by free radicals produces an unusual pileup of short snippets of RNA in some neurons. This RNA buildup may predispose cells to neurodegenerative diseases.

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Electrical stimulation in the nose induces sense of smell in human subjects

Physicians have, for the first time, induced a sense of smell in humans by using electrodes in the nose to stimulate nerves in the olfactory bulb, a structure in the brain where smell information from the nose is processed and sent to deeper regions of brain.

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How to Handle Rejection and Overcome the Fear of Being Rejected

We have all experienced rejection at some point. It can hurt and cut us deeply. As human beings, we innately want to be loved and accepted. A sense of belonging to a community is one of our fundamental ingredients for survival. We were never meant to live in isolation.

Receiving rejection today is certainly not what it used to be, given how far less connected we are in this digital age of technology.

In the split-second instant we post on social media, we’re unconsciously broadcasting our desire to be seen and to connect. But when that Instagram selfie or Facebook post doesn’t receive the number of likes or comments we thought it might, we feel disappointed, overlooked and left behind.

We then flog ourselves with self-blame, debilitating guilt, over-accountability and hopeless thoughts about the future. Romantic rejections are where we tend to be most vulnerable and left raw to our core. However, it doesn’t have to be this way. You can recover.

So how to handle rejection? Here are six ways to help you rebalance the washing machine of emotional and mental turmoil you can be thrown into (sometimes without any warning) so that rejection can become one of the most positive life-changing gifts you can receive.

1. Diffuse the fear of being rejected by acknowledging and expecting it can and will hurt

After twenty-five years of marriage and a couple of adult-age children, being told “I don’t love you anymore” would and should feel like a dagger piercing your tender heart. The psychological blow can hurt just as much as the physical pain of a right hook to your jaw or punch to the stomach.

To overcome the sting of rejection, stop trying to avoid feeling that stings. Stop pretending your unaffected if indeed, you are. Acknowledge that the sharp, heavy emotional pain you feel is as valid and real as any physical pain. Trying to sugar coat what you feel and experience will do you far more harm than good.

Listen to the voice inside you that describes the injustice you feel. Give it air time. Allow that voice to talk and lick the emotional wounds.

If you don’t, that emotional energy will continue to tug at you like the child constantly pulling at the mother’s skirt to grab her attention. Listen to the voice’s mix of rage, sadness, loss and loneliness. You will start to feel relief simply by no longer pretending you’re invincible and allowing the flood of your feelings to flow.

2. Physically sever your connection with rumination

If your friends are rolling their eyes and sighing when you describe to them for the fifth time in minute detail the story of how you were unfairly treated in your dream job interview process, it’s time to shift. You’re wasting time and energy - theirs and yours - and stopping yourself from moving on. Instead, enlist the help of your partner, family and friends.

Make a contract with your partner, family and friends allowing them to catch you in the throes of verbal diarrhea and stop you purging, yet again. Work out three or four different activities which will distract you and turn your attention to something productive. Choose the activity wisely, though. It’s not simply about distracting yourself and keeping yourself busy.

Choose something that catalyzes good energy within you, occupies your mindset and shifts your mood. Physical activities are great examples. Move your body, listen to music, go and shoot a few hoops with your mates in the lunch break or after work. Consider starting a small project completely unrelated to your rejection experience that engages you to purposefully contribute.

By activating neural pathways that increase a healthy mental state, the shackles of rumination will start to lose their grip. Use your friends and family to keep you accountable and break the debilitating rhythm of rumination.

3. Regulate the amount of rejection opportunities you expose yourself to

We all have a different threshold of the amount of rejection we can handle. Repeatedly receiving the notice ‘we regret to inform you that your application has been successful’ becomes a soul-destroying exercise before too long if you’re desperate to find a new job.

When times are particularly tough, you need to protect your mental and emotional states. Wisely considering how much more you can handle is essential. Before you take another step forward, ask yourself if you have the right resources and support in place to catch you.

If you have stood at desperation station, hoping to board the train and it keeps passing you by, sometimes the best thing you can do is stop trying to board for a while. Take a rest. Allow your mind and your thoughts to breathe.

Turn your attention to activities and opportunities, which don’t put you at risk again of rejection, at least for a short period. During the rest periods, your muscles repair and become stronger after a weights workout. Your mind and heart are the same. You must allow them to breathe before you put them at risk of future battle and bruising.

Know that you will always have a different capacity and resilience to handle rejection than your neighbor, so be careful of setting goals to step back into the boxing ring before you’re truly ready.

Get familiar with what your thresholds are and honor them. If you need to take a few days off from doing job application after job application, do so. Your mind will be refreshed, better focused and relaxed so that you can put your best foot forward at your next attempts.

Elite athletes experience peaks and troughs throughout their training regimes and competitions. It’s a given fact of their journey. So too is the ebb and flow of recuperating from rejection and then jumping back on the horse and getting going again.

4. Attach a different meaning to your definition and experience of rejection

Several research studies by Carol Dweck and Lauren Howe at Stanford University have revealed that individuals with fixed mindsets in romantic rejection contexts, experience negative effects of rejection for longer.((Standford: Stanford research explains why some people have more difficulty recovering from romantic breakups))

Participants who believed personalities were generally set in stone and unchanging, ascribed ‘faults’ in their personalities, as opposed to identifying that the rejection could be an opportunity for positive change or growth. They believed these ‘faults’ were permanent and also worried about how future relationships would be continually affected.

If you feel experiencing a rejection means there is something wrong with you, you’re far from alone. But this doesn’t mean your thinking is accurate. Invite yourself to consider:

• Is it possible that the deductions I am making about myself are actually not true… that they are simply fueled by the intense, turbulent emotions I am feeling in these moments?
• Is it possible that this rejection is just an indication that what I wanted to belong to and be part of is not a suitable fit for me?
• Could this rejection be a guiding rail to steer me back on the course I am truly meant to be on, or something even better I have not yet been able to fathom?
• Could this actually be a grand opportunity to grow and expand into a better version of myself?

When Steve Jobs was rejected and sacked from his own company in 1985, he went on to generate his first billion dollars with Pixar Animation Studios after purchasing it from Lucasfilm in 1986.((Fortune: How Steve Jobs Became a Billionaire)) Today, Pixar is the most successful animation studio of its kind.

By being rejected and insulted colorfully by the seemingly attractive man or woman you approached at the bar, you could have saved yourself a marriage of heartache and abuse. In fact, the door is now open for you to continue your discovery journey of finding someone who is a much better potential complement and at the very least has far superior manners!

Where rejection is possible, hold a palm card containing the above questions in your pocket to access a reality check. See if you can step into a growth mindset and practice thinking more widely about the consequences of your being rejected.

What have you learned and discovered about yourself? What have you learned from the rejection experience? What opportunities can you now see that perhaps have not been able to see before? When you feel ready to step forward again, will you go in the same direction again or will you pivot? Might you do things differently this time?

Rejection can, in fact, be a glorious unveiling of new possibilities.

5. Learn to recalibrate the rejection experience to reduce its impact on you

Think about times when you have wanted something that has been out of your reach. There has been at least a risk, a gap or an obstacle that is in the way of you getting what you want. Do you want it more? The scarcity of your being able to reach the prize or reward you’re stretching for seems to become more attractive and valuable when it’s harder to obtain. It’s a key sales psychology feature businesses use to effectively sell to their customers; they market to your fear of missing out.

When you get the defining negative answer, the yearning for that thing you so strongly desired somehow becomes stronger. The reality, however, is that nothing specific changed about the person you longed to date. The job description or remuneration package remained the same whether you were the chosen candidate or someone else was. However in your mind and heart, you, for some reason, feel a greater sense of loss.

Can you recognize if you do this? If so, ask yourself these two questions:

• Could I have idolized the situation or person which has now led me to feel such a deep sense of loss, sadness and unworthiness? Could I have put the person or opportunity on a pedestal which made the fall of being rejected so much harder on impact?
• Are there negative attributes about the situation that I was not seeing because I was wanting this so badly?

It’s only after you have allowed some time to pass after the initial experience of your rejection, that you will be able to more objectively answer these questions. Only reflect when the initial intensity of the sting has subsided. It’s only then you’ll be able to see the other side of the coin.

Sometimes it’s only through rejection that you can see the grass is not as green as it appeared after all. Your loss is not as great and you’ve not fallen as far as you thought.

6. Learn to build resilience to diffuse the fear of future rejection

You can grow confidence through being rejected. It comes down to proactively reviewing your behavioral patterns and resources and forecasting your recovery strategy should you be in the firing line to take a fall in the future.

After you have licked your wounds, take time to reflect and look at how you reacted and responded. What were your patterns? How well were you resourced to handle the fall? Did you withdraw and isolate yourself to lick your wounds? Was this helpful or might having talked with other close friends or family helped you process the emotional pain faster and more effectively? Did you have a plan prepared for the potentiality of experiencing the rejection?

If you don’t have a plan, develop one.

By predicting how your emotions and thoughts could be sent into a spin, you give yourself a stronger sense of maintaining self-control should rejection hit. You lessen the shock of the blow if you also know you’ve got a first aid plan in place.

Write down what thoughts and emotions you could experience in the face of a rejection. If it’s anger, have a healthy strategy prepared to process the energy of that anger. If it’s sadness, build time in your schedule to allow yourself to feel the sadness either alone or in the company of a supportive friend, colleague, family member or therapist.

Once you’ve managed to process a fair amount of the emotional and cognitive fallout, now invest in things which restore your energy, strength and willingness to bounce back. Then, consider stepping back into the boxing ring.

When you have plans and strategies in place, overcoming rejection and the fear of it becomes more like cruising over a small speed hump rather than giving up hope completely of walking again after tumbling to base camp from the summit of Mt Everest.

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Cancer treatments may affect cognitive function by accelerating biological aging

Cancer treatments are suspected to accelerate certain aging processes in the body. A new study has found that indicators of such biological aging correlate with declines in cognitive function in women who had undergone breast cancer treatment several years earlier. The findings point to an aging-like effect of cancer treatments and further connect this to cognitive decline.

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The five types of problem drinking are more common at different ages

Alcohol abuse is more complicated than simply drinking too much. There may be five separate types of problem drinkers, according to Penn State researchers, and each one may be more common at different stages of life.

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When Stranger Finds Lost Wallet on Airplane, He Returns It to Owner With Even More Cash Inside

This compassionate stranger could have just returned the lost wallet, but he says that he wanted to “have a little fun” instead.

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DJ Playing Records From His Garden Shed Since 1974 for an Audience of One – His Wife, is Given His Own Show

For the last 44 years, Deke Duncan has been spinning records from a studio in his garden shed for “the smallest audience in the country” – also known as his wife. Because he did not have a radio license, Duncan was only able to ‘broadcast’ through a speaker placed in the living room of the […]

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48 Years After Reading the Christmas Card That Got Him Through the Vietnam War, He Finally Got to Meet the Sender

It’s been almost fifty years since John Metzler received the Christmas card from Donna Caye that meant so much to him. At the time, he was a 23-year-old helicopter sniper who was in the middle of fighting in the Vietnam War – and while his time overseas was brutal, he says there was one thing that […]

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Couple Claims Lotto Ticket With Two Weeks to Spare Thanks to Last-Minute Thanksgiving Cleaning

After discovering a few unchecked lottery tickets, this Louisiana couple is definitely thankful for last-minute house cleaning.

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MRI scans shows promise in predicting dementia

Doctors may one day be able to gauge a patient's risk of dementia with an MRI scan, according to a new study. Using a new technique for analyzing MRI data, researchers were able to predict who would experience cognitive decline with 89 percent accuracy.

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Never-before-seen DNA recombination in the brain linked to Alzheimer's disease

Scientists have identified gene recombination in neurons that produces thousands of new gene variants within Alzheimer's disease brains. The study reveals for the first time how the Alzheimer's-linked gene, APP, is recombined by using the same type of enzyme found in HIV. The findings provide rationale for evaluating HIV antiretroviral therapies in people with Alzheimer's. It also provides an explanation for why clinical trials for Alzheimer's have failed to date.

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Taxi Driver Saves His Marriage By Inventing Anti-Snore Pillow That He Dreamt Up in His Sleep

Phil Moore's wife couldn't handle his snoring any longer – but thankfully, he dreamt up the perfect business idea to save the day.

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Company Founder Surprises Employees With $20 Million: ‘I wanted to show some gratitude’

This company founder wanted to show his employees some love for the holiday season by dolling out some serious cash.

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9 Best Sleep Tracker Apps To Help You Get Adequate Sleep

A good night’s sleep is hard to come by these days. A lot of people are suffering from sleep loss, insomnia and poor quality of sleep. The reasons vary including unhealthy lifestyle, work pressure or personal issues.

However, the good part here is that, technology can help you monitor sleep and ultimately work towards getting you 7 to 9 hours of peaceful rest.

I have read through plenty of research, tested apps myself and have finally compiled the list of following 9 sleep tracker apps will aid you to lead a better lifestyle and boost productivity.

1. Sleep Cycle

The bestseller, and for a reason. This extremely useful app is intuitive and gives away a lot of important information.

This sleep tracking app records sleep quality plus the average time you are spending in your bed. It gives you a detailed analysis of your hours -- When are you in deep asleep? When is your lightest sleep phase? When are you waking up on an average? It collates the data and further pins down your weekly and monthly sleep patterns. 

The developers keep on adding functionalities to enhance user experience. The latest being the ability to detect snoring. The app has got its own patent on sleep tracking technology and has been featured on some major health and lifestyle publications.

Download the app here!

2. Sleep Score

The app and its underlying technology are well researched and based on scientific methods. The makers claim that they have undergone years of research and have reviewed multiple sleep patterns to make the app close to perfect. They have devised a proprietary “sleep score” based on six sleeping parameters and give personalized recommendations to improve your sleep.

The app is advanced enough to understand if there are 2 or more people sleeping on the bed and makes sure that the tracking is correct. You don’t have to wear accessories under your bed for the app to analyze your sleep patterns.

Another unique feature about Sleep Score is that it sells accessories that can further analyze lights and sounds of the room to better analyze your sleep patterns. Trust this app to give you a scientific and structured data to help you track, monitor and ultimately sleep better.

Download the app here!

3. Sleep Tracker 24/7

The developers claim that it is a sleep optimization app. The application does all the basic things that all the other sleep tracking apps do. For example monitor when you are asleep, when you are waking up, body motions etc.

However, it does pack a few USPs. It measures your heart rate to check your sleep quality. The app provides an option wherein you can set an alarm when your sleep quality lowers so that you wake up when you are completely rested.

If this was not all, the app can also be used to account for naps and power naps. The data of all this can be integrated together to give you a wholesome analysis of your sleeping behavior.

If you are looking for an application that can give you a holistic approach to your sleeping patterns MotionX 24/7 is a recommendation.

Download the app here!

4. Sleep Bot

It is a bot that helps you sleep better. It has garnered some good reviews from existing user base. It has a reliable sleep tracking technology built in and a smart alarm that helps you wake up in the morning in your lightest sleep phase. The app also has some relaxing and ambient music that helps you sleep better.

The alarm feature is one that sets this app apart from others. AI is embedded into the alarm which helps it to learn user behavior, patterns and movements, and adjust alarms accordingly. The alarm plays soft music 30 minutes before the actual first alarm. There are also custom sounds that you can set based on your preference. With the app, you are assured of a Good Morning.

Download the app here!

5. Sleep Genius

Endorsed by scientists from NASA, the developers claim that this is the most advanced sleep tracking app in the world. The app is made by authorities in the space of neuroscience, sleep and music to bring to you an app that not only tracks your sleeping patterns but helps your brain relax and sleep soundly.

The app has various programs that can be customized to your preferences and daily routines. These include sleep pattern, cycle alarms, relaxation programs and power naps.

Sleep Genius has also ventured into IoT Development and have brought out devices that help you create an ecosystem for a sound night’s sleep.

Sleep Genius is developed by using research that helps astronauts fall asleep. Chances are that it will also benefit you and help improve your sleep quality.

Download the app here!

6. Pillow

Another app that springs from the advent of Internet of Things. It tracks, records, monitors everything that you do during your sleep (including snoring!). You don't need to adjust any settings, set alarms or set it up. Just wear your apple watch to sleep and Pillow does its job.

It is a good app for those who are obsessed with wearables and like to keep them close. Not only sleep, the app also monitors your heart rate and record audios during your sleep hours. This gives you a complete insight into your sleeping cycle. A beautiful visualization chart explains your patterns and helps improve sleeping quality.

Download the app here!

7. Sleep Tracker

This app is for people who believe that a good sleep is how your entire day has been -- what you've eaten, how productive you were, your moods etc.

This app comes with Mood Diary that syncs easily to cloud. You can make entries of your mood throughout the day in the diary. You can also track calories, weight, time, to-do etc. making it a complete lifestyle app.

It also reads out loud to you all the analysis in 8+ languages.

Download the app here!

8. Alarm Clock Xtreme

Technically an alarm clock app but it has evolved to a full fledged sleep tracking app. It is intuitive, has a beautiful UI and is being constantly upgraded.

The app contains melodious alarm sounds and tricky snooze options. The alarm will snooze only when you solve a maths problem -- an amazing feature for people who keep hitting the snooze button and fail to wake up.

The sleep tracking features are as good as any other app (although in beta stage). It also gives you a lot of manual settings which you can adjust according to your preferences.

If you are looking for a perfect combination of an advanced alarm clock and a basic sleep tracking app, Alarm Clock Xtreme won't disappoint you.

Download the app here!

9. Sleep as Android

As the name suggested, it is exclusive to Android users. This app is on the list because it has almost 250,000 reviews on the Google Play giving it a 4.3 star.

The app uses advanced technologies like motion sensor and sonar to detect motions and patterns during sleep. It also comes standard with a smart alarm which won’t turn off unless you perform tasks which it shows you on screen.

Compatible with various smart devices like Samsung health, Google fit and Fitbit, this app is a must have if you are looking to up your overall fitness game.

Download the app here!

The Bottom Line

Using these apps is recommended not only to improve your sleep quality but also your overall lifestyle and health. In an era where tension is rising and sleep related disorders are common, technology, if used correctly can come to your aid.

Having said that, try to balance your sleep with healthy eating, workouts, minimal stress and meditation too. The worst you can do is to consider these apps as a magic wand that is an immediate cure for your sleep problems. 

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GNN Founder Talks About Her New Book of Good News in Thanksgiving Day Video

A Thanksgiving Day message from GNN Founder, Geri Weis-Corbley: We have a new book coming out—a collection of 28 of the most inspiring stories published in the first 20 years of the Good News Network. (Sign up here and be notified about when and where to buy it!) Happy Thanksgiving to all those around the world […]

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Keep slapping on that sunscreen

It's safe to slap on the sunscreen this summer -- in repeated doses -- despite what you may have read about the potential toxicity of sunscreens, researchers say.

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Cutting the legs off cancer

Melanoma skin cancer tumors grow larger and are more likely to metastasize due to interactions between a pair of molecules, according to experiments in mice and human cells. The results may restore the potential for a type of cancer therapy previously abandoned in clinical trials. The results also implicate one molecule already connected to obesity and dementia as a potential cause of metastasis, or spread of cancer cells to other areas of the body.

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Slowed brainwaves linked to early signs of brain cells going haywire due to dementia

To turn back the clock on Alzheimer's disease, many researchers are seeking ways to effectively diagnose the neurodegenerative disorder earlier. One potential way to do this is by tracking a person's brainwave activity, which slows down in certain brain regions that are likely to be affected by the disease next, according to recent findings.

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Orange juice, leafy greens and berries may be tied to decreased memory loss in men

Eating leafy greens, dark orange and red vegetables and berry fruits, and drinking orange juice may be associated with a lower risk of memory loss over time in men.

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Inmates Write Heartfelt Letter to Police Department Offering Condolences for Slain Officer

The police station has received an overwhelming amount of support since the officer's death, but they were especially touched by this emotional letter.

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Watch Bus Driver Offer Comfort and Resources to Homeless Passenger Escaping the Cold

This is not the first time that Natalie Barnes has helped her passengers – but her kindness recently helped a homeless man into housing.

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What Defines a Good Relationship? 13 Tips on How to Foster One

You probably think that couples that have a good relationship don’t fight, rarely go to bed angry, spend all their time together and are super romantic. This is the mindset that makes many couples feel defeated in their relationships, especially when they are going through conflict.

Just because you disagree with your partner every once in a while; or probably a little bit more than that, doesn’t mean that you cannot have a great relationship. Even the almost perfect relationship experiences misunderstandings, arguments, and disputes.

Your relationship is one of the most crucial components of your life. Many people put all their effort on the flirting and the dating, and then totally ignore their relationship once they are together. Developing and maintaining the relationship with your partner is the most important thing you can do for yourself.

Your relationship affects your stress levels, health, and happiness. No relationship is perfect all the time. However, connecting with your partner emotionally, physically and romantically is such a fantastic thing that it deserves all your effort. Here are some tips for building a healthy relationship:

1. Communicate with patience

Communication is one of the essential qualities of a great relationship. Unfortunately, experts indicate that many couples do not know how to communicate appropriately; or even communicate at all.

Healthy couples vocalize their love for one another. They take time to discuss their feelings, and they don’t leave their partners trying to figure out what’s going on. When partners make assumptions, expectations are set and just as quickly, they are deflated. The unmet expectations then leave partners questioning the viability of the relationship.((Positive Psychology Program: How to Improve Communication in Relationships))

Partners in a healthy relationship discuss even the most challenging subjects and agree to disagree. They know that they will not always see eye to eye and that’s ok. They, therefore, respect each other’s opinions and ideas.

They talk about sex openly and honestly. When partners tell each other what they find enjoyable and what they don’t like, they have better sex and, consequently, have a stronger relationship.

Some couples even go as far as seeing a counseling service. Your insurance may even cover a set amount of sessions per year. So if your paying for them why not use them. Otherwise the cost is anywhere from $5 to $300 per hour,((An Honest Approach: The Average Cost of Marriage Counseling)) this typically depends on your location and any entitlements/benefits you are eligible for.

2. Compromise

Every relationship will be punctuated by conflict. It is not a conflict that affects your relationship, but how you handle issues. The most crucial element in solving the conflict in your relationship is compromise.((Yoh: Five Relationship Building Tips for All Your Relationships)) You cannot be the one who is right all the time and it shouldn’t be you who always has the answers.

Keep an open mind, and you will be surprised at how a bit of compromise can go a long way.

3. Appreciate often

Many times, couples fall into patterns and take for granted all the things that their partners do for them. Notice all the small things that your partner does for you and thank them.

Appreciation is an excellent motivator to your partner, and it generates positive feelings within the relationship. Also, when you consciously practice appreciation and gratitude, you will focus more on the good instead of fixating on the negatives, and you will be much happier in your relationship.((Psychology Today: 10 Ways to Nurture Your Relationship))

4. Always respect each other

Your relationship with your partner will thrive if you both feel respected by each other.

Respecting your partner comes in many forms: being mindful of their feelings, beliefs, time, and trust.

Conversely, many things can break down the respect in your relationship:((Bustle: 10 Habits of Couples in Strong and Healthy Relationships))

• Name calling
• Talking negatively about your partner to friends and family
• Threatening to leave the relationship

5. Allow for personal space

Your relationship will be healthy if you allow room for each other to foster individuality. Allow each other time for friends, family, hobbies and other individual interests. This will help you and your partner to not only maintain separate identities but also nourish a healthy sense of self.

Spending all the time together might not only make you and your partner feel as if you are suffocating in the relationship but will also create an unhealthy co-dependence.

6. Be each other’s rock

Everyone goes through tough times, and when your partner is experiencing a personal challenge, your support can make the world of difference.

Also, no matter how independent you are, teach yourself to lean on your partner for support. Going through hard times together will bring you closer and strengthen your relationship.((Time: 10 Ways to Improve Your Relationship Instantly))

7. Be responsible for your happiness

Sometimes, partners expect too much from each other. People who were never happy hope to be happy because they are in a relationship; those who were never confident hope to feel confident; those who never felt they had value expect to feel valued just because they are a couple.

Unfortunately, looking to your partner to provide you with happiness and self-worth will lead to gross disappointment. It is entirely in order to expect your partner to treat you well, but your happiness and self -worth should come from within.

8. Learn more about each other

Who is your partner really? What excites him/her? What are their goals and dreams? You can become consumed by what you think your partner needs as opposed to knowing what truly resonates with them.

Remember, what your partner wants does not have to make sense to you: you just have to understand it.

9. Learn to validate your partner’s feelings

Validating your partner increases the emotional security of your relationship, which is a crucial component of a healthy relationship. Listen to your partner without the urge to analyze, solve or fix things.

Even when you do not understand your partner’s point of view, you can always say: ‘I hear you!’

Validate your partner’s feelings unconditionally, and you will help them feel that you are a safe ally and that they are not alone. No feelings are invalid.((Psych Central: 7 Relationship Maintenance Tips for Healthy Couples))

Here's why your lover doesn’t want your advice, but your validation.

10. Check in with each other

At the end of a long day, the standard question between couples is: ‘How was your day?’ Generally, the question will yield a superficial answer such as ‘Fine. How was yours?’ This will not in any way improve the connection between you and your partner.

Instead, ask questions like ‘What was the most challenging part of your day? And you will be amazed at how much insight you will gain into your loved one.

Seek to become an expert on your partner, and you will find it much easier to make them happy.((Mind Body Green: 13 Tips to Make a Good Relationship Great))

11. Fight appropriately

Disagreeing is perfectly healthy. Just because you are fighting does not mean that you do not love each other or that you are headed for a breakup. You merely have a difference of opinion.

Remind yourselves that you are on the same team. Negotiate your disagreements successfully by assuring yourselves that ultimately, you want the same outcome: peace and fulfillment in your relationship.

When you have things in the right perspective, you will not attack or intentionally hurt each other during arguments. Instead, you will strive to understand each other and work towards a solution.

12. Sleep on it

If you realize that your argument has hit a dead end, shelf it to another time; the next morning or later in the day. However, experts recommend that do not wait longer than a full day to revisit the issue.

13. Keep things interesting

You will change over and over again in the course of your relationship and so will your partner. Keep things in your relationship interesting by trying new activities and breaking out of your normal routine.

Seek to stay attractive with each other not only physically, but also intellectually. Bring new ideas and perspectives into your relationship and bring up topics that are genuinely engaging to your partner.

Learn from this article how to keep the spark alive in a relationship.

Final thoughts

Ultimately, if you want to build a great relationship, aim to make your partner feel good about themselves. The times your partner spends with you should not make them feel apprehensive but excited and energized.

The secret is to ensure that the good times in your relationship are more than the fights and the arguments. Your relationship should not feel like a second job, but a source of pleasure, fun, and comfort. You should look forward to being together after a long day at work.

Finally, do not compare your relationship with others: their homes, jobs, vacations. Things are seldom what they look like.

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Woman Praises Kind-Hearted Police Officer for Helping Her Get ‘Hamilton’ Tickets in Her Time of Need

Police officers are not generally praised for their hand in delivering tickets, but Officer Dicandia is definitely the exception.

The post Woman Praises Kind-Hearted Police Officer for Helping Her Get ‘Hamilton’ Tickets in Her Time of Need appeared first on Good News Network.

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Tiny Town in Nebraska (Population: 2) Gets a Reunion Thanksgiving Feast From Ancestry Company

Mary and Mike Finnegan are the only two residents of their Nebraska town – so Ancestry decided to give them some company for the holidays.

The post Tiny Town in Nebraska (Population: 2) Gets a Reunion Thanksgiving Feast From Ancestry Company appeared first on Good News Network.

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Instead of Canceling Flights, Canadian Couple Spends Vacation Helping California Wildfire Victims

Not only did they fly to California for their trip, they also spent all of their vacation money on helping the wildfire victims.

The post Instead of Canceling Flights, Canadian Couple Spends Vacation Helping California Wildfire Victims appeared first on Good News Network.

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Watch Police Officer Soothe Distraught Family By Singing and Playing On Their Piano

When a Florida family was distressed over their injured father, a compassionate police officer used music to ease their anxiety. Officer Hernandez had been patrolling a Pembroke Pines neighborhood in his cruiser when he heard about a nearby household that had dialed 911. A sick, elderly man was lying on the floor after a fall, […]

The post Watch Police Officer Soothe Distraught Family By Singing and Playing On Their Piano appeared first on Good News Network.

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Hero Garbageman Refuses to Flee Wildfires So He Can Check On Seniors Along His Route

LISTEN to this story in our podcast, told by The Good News Guru (the GNN Founder) on Friday’s radio broadcast with Ellen K on KOST-103.5 — Or, READ the story below… (Subscribe to our podcast on iTunes – or for Androids, on Podbean) In Butte County, California, a garbageman refused to evacuate the path of a wildfire until he checked up on all his elderly customers—and […]

The post Hero Garbageman Refuses to Flee Wildfires So He Can Check On Seniors Along His Route appeared first on Good News Network.

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Mmore effective hydrogel for healing wounds

Researchers have created an easy-to-make, low-cost injectable hydrogel that could help wounds heal faster, especially for patients with compromised health issues.

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Eyes of Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease patients show evidence of prions

By the time symptoms of sporadic Creutzfeldt-Jakob disease (sCJD) are typically discovered, death is looming and inevitable. In a new study, researchers report finding tell-tale evidence of the condition's infectious agent in the eyes of deceased sCJD patients, making the eye a potential source for both early CJD detection and prevention of disease transmission.

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The Best Ways to Save Money Even Impulsive Spenders Can Get Behind

The truth is, there are many “money saving guides” online, but most don’t cover the root issue for not saving. Once I’d discovered a few key factors that allowed me to save 10k in one year, I realized why most articles couldn’t help me. The problem is that even with the right strategies you can still fail to save money. You need to have the right systems in place and the right mindset. In this guide, I’ll cover the best ways to save money -- practical yet powerful steps you can take to start saving more. It won’t be easy but with hard work, I’m confident you’ll be able to save more money–even if you’re an impulsive spender.

Why Your Past Prevents You from Saving Money

Are you constantly thinking about your financial mistakes? If so, these thoughts are holding you back from saving. I get it, you wish you could go back in time to avoid your financial downfalls. But dwelling over your past will only rob you from your future. Instead, reflect on your mistakes and ask yourself what lessons you can learn from them. It wasn’t easy for me to accept that I had accumulated thousands of dollars in credit card debt. Once I did, I started heading in the right direction. Embrace your past failures and use them as an opportunity to set new financial goals. For example, after accepting that you’re thousands of dollars in debt create a plan to be debt free in a year or two. This way when you’ll be at peace even when you get negative thoughts about your finances. Now you can focus more time on saving and less on your past financial mistakes.

How to Effortlessly Track Your Spending

Stop manually tracking your spending. Leverage powerful analytic tools such as Personal Capital and these money management apps to do the work for you. This tool has worked for me and has kept me motivated to why I’m saving in the first place. Once you login to your Personal Capital dashboard, you’re able to view your net worth. When I’d first signed up with Personal Capital, I had a negative net worth, but this motivated me to save more. With this tool, you can also view your spending patterns, expenses, and how much money you’re saving. Use your net worth as your north star to saving more. Whenever you experience financial setbacks, view how far you’ve come along. Saving money is only half the battle, being consistent is the other half.

The Truth on Why You Keep Failing

Saving money isn’t sexy. If it was, wouldn’t everyone be doing it? Some people are natural savers, but most are impulsive spenders. Instead of denying that you’re an impulsive spender, embrace it. Don’t try to save 60 to 70% of your income if this means you’ll live a miserable life. Saving money isn’t a race but a marathon. You’re saving for retirement and for large purchases. If you’re currently having a hard time saving, start spending more money on nice things. This may sound counterintuitive but hear me out. Wouldn’t it be better to save $200 each month for 12 months instead of $500 for 3 months? Most people run into trouble because they create budgets that set them up for failure. This system won’t work for those who are frugal, but chances are they don’t need help saving. This system is for those who can’t save money and need to be rewarded for their hard work. Only because you’re buying nice things doesn’t mean that you’ll save less. Here are some rules you should have in place:

1. Save more than 50% of your available money (after expenses)
2. Only buy nice things after saving
3. Automate your savings with automatic bank transfers

These are the same rules that helped me save thousands each year while buying the latest iPhone. Focus only on items that are important to you. Remember, you can afford anything but not everything.

How to Foolproof Yourself out of Debt

Personal finance is a game. On one end, you’re earning money; and on the to other, you’re saving. But what ends up counting in the end isn’t how much you earn but how much you save. Research shows that about 60% of Americans spend more than they save.((FINRA: Financial Capability in the United States 2016)) So how can you separate yourself from the 60%? By not accumulating more debt. This way you’ll have more money to save and avoid having more financial obligations. A great way to stop accumulating debt is using cash to pay for all your transactions. This will be challenging, depending on how reliant you are with your credit card, but it’s worth the effort. Not only will you stop accruing debt, but you’ll also be more conscious with what you buy. For example, you’ll think twice about purchasing a new $200 headphone despite having the cash to buy them. According to a poll conducted by The CreditCards.com, 5 out of 6 Americans are impulsive spenders.((The CreditCards.com: Survey: 5 in 6 Americans admit to impulse buys)) Telling yourself that you’ll have the discipline to not buy things won’t cut it. This is equal to having junk food in your fridge while trying to eat healthy–it’s only a matter of time before you slip. By using cash to make your purchases, you’ll spend less and save more.

A Proven Formula to Skyrocket Your Savings

Having proven systems in place to help you save more is important, but they’re not the best way to save money. You can search for dozens of ways to save money, but there’ll always be a limit. Instead of spending the majority of your effort saving, look for ways to increase your income. The truth is that once you have the right systems in place, saving is easy. What’s challenging is earning more money. There are many routes you can take to achieve this. For example, you can work long and hard at your current job to earn a raise. But there’s one problem–you’re depending on someone else to give you a raise. Your company will have to have the budget, and you’ll have to know how to toot your own horn to get this raise. This isn’t to say that earning a raise is impossible, but things are better when you’re in control right? That’s why building a side-hustle is the best way to increase your income. Think of your side-hustle as a part-time job doing something you enjoy. You can sell items on eBay for a profit, or design websites for small businesses. Building a side-hustle will be on the hardest things you’ll do, be too stubborn to quit. During the early stages, you won’t be making money and that’s okay. Since you already have a source of income, you won’t be dependent on your side-hustle to pay for your expenses. Depending on how much time you invest in your side-hustle, it can one day replace your current income. Whatever route you take, focus more on earning and save as much as possible. You have more control than you give yourself credit for.

Transform Yourself into a Saving Money Machine

Saving money isn’t complicated but it’s one of the hardest things you’ll do. By learning from your mistakes and rewarding yourself after saving you’ll save more. What would you do with an extra $200 or $500 each month? To some, this is life-changing money that can improve the quality of their lives. The truth is saving money is an art. Save too much and you’ll quit, but save too little and you’ll pay for the consequences in the future. Saving money takes effort and having the right systems in place. Imagine if you’d started saving an extra $100 this next month? Or, saved $20K in one year? Although it’s hard to imagine, this can be your reality if you follow the principles covered in this guide. Take a moment to brainstorm which goals you’d be able to reach if you had extra money each month. Use these goals as motivation to help you stay on track on your journey to saving more. If I was able to save thousands of dollars with little guidance, imagine what you’ll be able to do. What are you waiting for? Go and start saving money, the sky is your limit.

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Molecular mechanisms of an African folk medicine

Researchers have discovered the molecular basis for therapeutic actions of an African folk medicine used to treat a variety of illnesses and disorders including diabetes, pain, headaches, paralysis and epilepsy.

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Response to daily stressors could affect brain health in older adults

Taking typical daily annoyances such as a long wait at the doctor's office or a traffic jam on the freeway in stride may help preserve brain health in older adults.

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Study of two tribes sheds light on role of Western-influenced diet in blood pressure

A South American tribe living in near-total isolation with no Western dietary influences showed no increase in average blood pressure from age one to age 60, according to a new study. In comparison, a nearby tribe whose diet includes some processed foods and salt did show higher blood pressure into late middle age.

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Severe eczema may best be treated by allergy shots

A medically-challenging case found that allergy shots provided significant benefits to the eczema symptoms suffered by a 48-year-old man.

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Scientists uncover crucial biological circuits that regulate lipids and their role in overall health

Tiny microscopic worms, invisible to the naked eye, are helping scientists to better understand an extraordinarily complex biological pathway that connects fat to overall health and aging in humans.

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How head injuries lead to serious brain diseases

Biologists reveal the hidden molecular basis of brain disorders and provide the first cell atlas of the hippocampus -- the part of the brain that helps regulate learning and memory -- as it is affected by traumatic brain injury. The researchers propose gene candidates for treating brain diseases associated with traumatic brain injury such as Alzheimer's disease and post-traumatic stress disorder.

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15 Natural Sleep Remedies for Insomnia That Are Backed by Science

Insomnia is something of a modern curse. Our lives are more hectic than ever before. When not working overtime, we're at home staring at our smartphones right up until the moment we try to go to sleep. With the stress of modern life, we're doing ourselves no favors by also ensuring we don't unwind properly at night. Our natural slide towards sleep suffers thanks to disruptive issues such as social media, video games, Netflix, and family life. How do you find time to ensure you get a good night's sleep? Here are 15 science-backed natural sleep remedies to help you nod off in style.

1. Get comfy

Make sure your bed is comfortable. This can vary person to person, but do whatever it takes to ensure your bed helps you drift off to sleep properly. Trying to sleep on a mattress that's like a plank of wood will not help your insomnia. So invest in something comfortable to reap the benefits. Here are a few ideas for you:

• Experiment with pillows to find what works best for you, but you can also add fun and inviting new pillows in to make your bed look more inviting.
• Make your bed - don't leave it looking like a mess.
• Try out a heated mattress if the cold winter months are a bit too much.
• Try out some essential oils to make your bedroom more relaxing.

2. Drink herbal teas

I've championed tea for the last decade thanks to its health benefits and relaxing qualities. Herbal teas are the way to go as they lack caffeine. It helps you to relax and unwind. What varieties should you consider? Well, here are a few:

• Chamomile
• Valerian root
• Mint
• Ginger
• Cinnamon

You can get cheap organic herbal tea with a mix of herbs to add some variety to your nighttime routine. Nettle and mint, for example, I've always found particularly useful for easing anxiety and aiding relaxation. The science backs it up. In 2011, a paper published on the US National Library of Medicine titled Chamomile: A herbal medicine of the past with bright future stated:((Mol Med Report: Chamomile: A herbal medicine of the past with bright future))

"Traditionally, chamomile preparations such as tea and essential oil aromatherapy have been used to treat insomnia and to induce sedation (calming effects). Chamomile is widely regarded as a mild tranquillizer and sleep-inducer. Sedative effects may be due to the flavonoid, apigenin that binds to benzodiazepine receptors in the brain."

3. Switch off your devices

Do smartphones cause insomnia? Dr. Andrew Weil answered this question back in 2015. His response:((Dr. Andrew Weil: Do Smart Phones Cause Insomnia?))

"One problem is that the blue light these devices emit can suppress production of the sleep regulating hormone melatonin, promoting insomnia. This effect is more pronounced than exposure to the light from a television screen in the bedroom because we hold smartphones and other electronic devices close to our faces, intensifying the light exposure."

Whilst it may seem like a modern luxury to lounge around in bed watching YouTube or Netflix on your smartphone, the reality is it disrupts your sleep.

4. Read

Whilst it's tempting to lounge around in bed watching Netflix or YouTube clips until you pass out, you're doing yourself no favors. Staring at those devices suppresses melatonin. The solution? Read! Reading a book for an hour before you go to bed is a brilliant way to get through some novels you've been meaning to get through. It's also a great way to calm down your brain and get it ready for a night of sleep.

5. Get napping to a T

Launching into napping without a plan isn't a good idea. If you head off and nap for a few hours, you may emerge feeling great, but you'll mess up your sleep pattern for your proper rest at night. Getting napping to a T isn't difficult, though. It just takes some good timing. Dr. Nerina Ramlakhan's book Fast Asleep, Wide Awake points out that you should take "controlled naps". Her advice is to take a nap of no more than 20 minutes to lift some fatigue off your mind. It can help you feel recharged. And it also won't disrupt your night's sleep later in the day.

6. Get your timing right

If your sleeping pattern is all over the place, then you can wave goodbye to any hope of sleeping properly. Consistency is key when it comes to sleep. Although this does mean you'll have to kick the concept of a weekend lie-in. Going to bed, and waking up, at the same time every day is an absolute must if you want to avoid sleep troubles. As reported on Bustle:((Bustle: Going To Sleep At The Same Time Every Night Can Make You Smarter, & There Are A Lot Of Other Surprising Benefits))

"Scientists who work in sleep health have a term for the period of time it takes you to get to sleep: it's called your sleep latency. And it turns out that maintaining a regular sleep schedule, according to several small studies, may cut down on the amount of time you spend tossing and turning before drifting off."

You can try this out yourself to see the benefits. On my schedule, I go to bed at 11pm every day. I wake up at 7am each morning. Once you've got your routine set, you'll notice differences such as:

• Getting to sleep faster
• Improvement in your mental abilities (essential for work, studying etc.)
• Mood improvements
• Health improvements (sleeping well is essential for weight loss, for example)

7. Lay off the alcohol

This may seem a bit unfair if you want to unwind after a day of hard work with a glass of wine. But the unfortunate truth is alcohol disrupts sleep patterns. Are your drinking days over, then? Well, according to The Sleep Doctor:((Sleep Doctor: The truth about alcohol and sleep))

"Does this mean you need to abstain from drinking altogether? Nope. But part of a smart, sleep-friendly lifestyle is managing alcohol consumption so it doesn’t disrupt your sleep and circadian rhythms ... Circadian rhythms regulate nearly all of the body’s processes, from metabolism and immunity to energy, sleep, and sexual drive, cognitive functions and mood."

A circadian rhythm is a naturally occurring process every 24 hours. As it turns out, although it's not too surprising, alcohol disrupts this process. But as The Sleep Doctor confirms, the more you drink, and the closer this is to bedtime, the more you'll disrupt your sleep pattern. It also greatly increases your chance of snoring. So, consider skipping alcohol most nights, or keep your intake to a minimum.

8. Monitor temperatures

This is kind of obvious. If it's searing hot (often the case during summer), it's difficult to sleep. Similarly, if you're freezing cold you'll struggle to stay asleep. Getting temperatures right is a big part of a sleeping routine, then, so experiment around with finding the right temperature to suit you. Take a look at how body temperature can seriously affect your sleep here: The Relationship Between Body Temperature and Sleep

9. Take up regular exercise

The National Sleep Organization (great to see there is such a thing!) champions regular exercise for better sleep. It states on a guide titled How Exercise Affects Sleep:((Sleep.org: How Exercise Affects Sleep))

"Want to fall asleep faster and wake up feeling more rested? Get moving! As little as 10 minutes of aerobic exercise, such as walking or cycling, can dramatically improve the quality of your nighttime sleep, especially when done on a regular basis."

10. Embrace magnificent magnesium

In another excellent piece from The National Sleep Organization, magnesium receives a recommendation for improving your sleep. Promote better sleep with magnesium - it's an essential mineral for keeping us health.((Sleep.org: Power (Down) Vitamins: Promote Better Sleep With Magnesium)) It can also, potentially, help us fall to sleep.

"Other research shows that magnesium increases the neurotransmitter GABA in the brain, which is responsible for slowing your thinking down and helping you fall asleep. If you are curious about the effects of magnesium, consider focusing on your nutrition first."

Foods rich in magnesium, which is a good starting point to get more of the stuff into you, include:

• Green, leafy vegetables such as kale and spinach
• Vegetables in general!
• Dark chocolate
• Nuts and seeds
• Fruit such as bananas
• Whole grains like brown rice

11. Try out other sleep-promoting supplements

Healthline backs mag nesium, too, but there are other supplements that are worth considering.((Healthline: 9 Natural Sleep Aids That Are Backed by Science)) These include:

• Valerian root (as with the herbal tea mentioned above)
• Lavender
• Passion flower
• Glycine
• Ginkgo biloba

12. Treat your bed as a bed

It's tempting to turn your bed into a piece of everyday furniture. You can lounge around on it, take in the latest films, eat your meals, call friends. But if you aim to associate your bed with just bedtime, then this can help you speed up your sleep cycle.

13. Meditate

Harvard Medical School, in 2015, were quick to point out that mindfulness meditation helps fight insomnia, improves sleep.((Harvard Health Publishing: Mindfulness meditation helps fight insomnia, improves sleep)) It states:

"Mindfulness meditation involves focusing on your breathing and then bringing your mind’s attention to the present without drifting into concerns about the past or future. It helps you break the train of your everyday thoughts to evoke the relaxation response, using whatever technique feels right to you."

There are plenty of modern apps that can help you start off on your mindfulness path. There're plenty of meditation apps for sleep. Why not try a few out? You can also take a look at this guide on how to meditate before bed to supercharge your sleep.

14. Embrace the shadows

In the great Japanese writer Jun'ichirō Tanizaki's essay In Praise of Shadows (1933), the author lamented the arrival of electric lights into the world. Architecture, natural light, shadows, and a well-placed candle, he championed, are what it takes to send a person towards a natural night of sleep. His famous quote reads:

"If light is scarce then light is scarce; we will immerse ourselves in the darkness and there discover its own particular beauty."

Tanizaki certainly would have hated the modern world, but we can take his wisdom and embrace the shadows in our home. Get some candles on the go, turn off the lights, and let the natural flow of evening surround you. Some candles have relaxing scents in them, too, such as lavender or vanvilla.

15. Try a 30 day sleep challenge

  The Sleep Council has a 30 Day Better Sleep Plan you can try. Over the course of a month, this free starts with a brief questionnaire on your sleep pattern, health, and lifestyle: The site also provides various sleep tools, such as free leaflets, stress tests, a sleep diary, and bed MOT (basically, to see if your bed is up to the task of providing you with a good night's sleep).

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Learn the Different Types of Love (and Better Understand Your Partner)

Love. Ahhhhh… they say it makes the world go ‘round. But does it? Does it always make us feel all warm and fuzzy inside? Or does it sometimes cause us problems in our relationships? Well, the answer is both. We have all had our share of relationship problems – especially in romantic ones. And when people say to me, “Relationships are hard!” I always reply, “Not they’re not. They are not inherently hard. It’s the people that make them hard.” What I mean by that is that humans are inherently selfish. We all want to “win” and to get other people to understand what we want. And unfortunately, that often results in two people who just don’t understand each other. And because of that, their relationship suffers. One key to healthy relationships is understanding the different types of love. Everyone gives and receives love differently. And in addition to that, some people are much more capable of experiencing certain types of love than others.

8 Types of Love According to the Ancient Greeks

The ancient Greeks studied love and classified them into eight different types. They studied everything from public speaking to the starts in the universe. And love is something they were also fascinated with. So, let’s take a look at the different types of love so you can better understand your own relationships.

1. Agape -- Unconditional Love

First, we have agape love. This is an altruistic, selfless, unconditional love. The Greeks thought it was quite radical, perhaps because so few people seem capable of feeling it long-term. Some people would describe agape as a type of spiritual love. For instance, Christians believe that Jesus exhibited this kind of love for all humans. He was selfless and sacrificed Himself so that others could be rid of their sins. He suffered for the happiness of others.

2. Eros -- Romanic Love

Eros is named after the Greek god of love and fertility. Therefore, it is usually associated with romantic, passionate, and physical love. It is an expression of sexual passion and desire. The Greeks were actually quite fearful of this love, strangely enough. They thought that because human beings have an instinctual impulse to procreate, that this love was so powerful and it would result in a loss of control. Although the Greeks thought this kind of love was dangerous, it is still the kind of love that is associated with passionate, sexual love. Even in modern days, some people believe that this kind of love “burns hot and bright, but it burns out fast.”

3. Philia -- Affectionate Love

The Greeks defined this kind of love as “affectionate love.” In other words, it is the kind of love that you feel for your friends. Ironically, the ancient Greeks thought this kind of love was better than eros (sexual love), because it represented love between people who considered themselves equals. While a lot of people associate the word “love” with romance, Plato always argued that physical attraction wasn’t necessary for love. Hence, why there are many different types of love. This type, in particular, is often referred to as “platonic” love – love without sexual acts.

4. Philautia -- Self-love

Philautia is self-love. In our modern day society, most people associate self-love with being narcissistic, selfish, or stuck on themselves. However, this is not what the ancient Greeks meant by self-love. Self-love is not negative or unhealthy in any way. In fact, it’s necessary to be able to give and receive love from other people. We cannot give to others what we don’t have. And if we don’t love ourselves, how can we truly love others? Another way to look at self-love is by thinking about it as self-compassion. Just as you might show affection and love to another person, you must also show that same affection and love to yourself.

5. Storge -- Familiar Love

Storge can be defined as “familiar love.” Although that’s a strange term, let me explain what it really means. This type of love looks and feels a lot like philia – affectionate love felt between friends. However, this love is more like a parent-child love. Just like philia, there is not physical or sexual attraction. But there is a strong bond, kinship, and familiarity between people.

6. Pragma -- Enduring Love

The ancient Greeks define pragma as “enduring love.” In other words, it’s almost the opposite of eros (sexual love). Eros tends to burn out quickly because of its passion and intensity. However, pragma is a love that has matured and developed over a long period of time. The kind of old married couples who have been together since their teenage years and still hold hands, well, that’s a great example of pragma. Unfortunately, this kind of love is somewhat rare to find – especially in society today. These days, people seem to think the grass is always greener on the other side. And therefore, they don’t have the patience or desire to watch love grow over time. This type of love doesn’t require a lot of effort in a relationship. Both people are good at making compromises, and each of them puts in equal efforts to make the other person happy.

7. Ludus -- Playful Love

Ludus is known as the “playful love.” However, a better way to describe it is the feeling of infatuation in the early days of romance. If you’ve been in love before, you know what I’m talking about. It’s the butterflies in your stomach, the giddiness you feel when you see your love walk through the door, and the feeling of never wanting to be without them. Studies show that when people are experiencing this type of love, their brain is acting much like it does if it was on cocaine. In other words, your brain is lit up and active just like someone who is literally high on a drug. It makes you feel alive and excited about life.

8. Mania -- Obsessive Love

Mania is not necessarily a good type of love, because it is obsessive. It’s the type of love that can lead someone into madness, jealousy, or even anger. That is because the balance between eros (sexual) and ludus (playful) is terribly off. Many people who experience this type of love suffer from low self-esteem. They fear losing the object of their love, and this fear compels them to say or do some “crazy” things in order to keep them. If not kept under control, mania can be very destructive in some cases.

The 5 Love Languages

The ancient Greeks weren’t the only ones to study love. A modern relationship therapist, Dr. Gary Chapman, identified five languages of love through his work with couples over a long period of time. His book, The Five Love Languages, provides a lot more detail. In a nutshell, Chapman argues that each of us give and receive love differently, but they all fall into five categories. And they are as follows:

1. Words of Affirmation

Some people want to hear “I love you” or other positive compliments from their partner. And if they don’t hear it, then they might feel unloved.

2. Acts of Service

Doing nice things for other people is called an “act of service.” Whether it’s changing someone’s oil, cleaning the house, or giving a back rub, doing things to help make the other person happy is what this one is about.

3. Receiving Gifts

Some people value giving and receiving gifts, and some do not. So, if you measure your partner’s love by how many gifts you are given, then your love language is “receiving gifts.”

4. Quality Time

Other people measure the quality of their love by how much time their significant other wants to spend with them. If they don’t get enough “together time,” then they might feel unloved.

5. Physical Touch

Finally, some individuals associate love with physical touch. Anything from hand-holding to cuddling, and even sex count as “physical touch.”

Why Do Love Languages Matter?

The point of learning the love languages is to identify both the way you give and want to receive love from your partner. If you both have very different love languages, it can cause problems in your relationship. For example, let’s say that you give love by saying “I love you” all the time, but you want to receive gifts in order to feel loved. But your partner shows his/her love with acts of service, and he/she wants to feel it with quality time. See the problem? They don’t match up. But don’t worry. You and your partner don’t need to speak the same love language to stay together. Here's why. All you need to do is discuss it with your partner. Once you understand how you both want to give and receive, then it’s not so difficult.

The Takeaway

We’re all different – and that’s okay. The problems we have in relationships sometimes simply come from not understanding each other fully, especially in the area of love. Now that you know the ancient Greek types of love, and the more modern love languages, hopefully you can take a good, hard, long look at your own relationships and make the necessary improvements.

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What’s the Meaning of Life? A Guide to Help You Live with Purpose

“What is the meaning of life?” is one of the most fundamental and enduring questions which has captivated the greatest minds of mankind for centuries. The answers, as varied as they come, go back to the very, very beginning of things—to our existence, to the reasons why humans were created, to our quest for self-improvement, and, of course, to religion. There is hardly a shortage of interpretations of what the “good life” is about, what makes us happy and fulfilled, and what we can do to get to this coveted state. If you talk to a scientist—say, a physicist and biologist, about the purpose of our being, they will likely tell you the fascinating story of the Big Bang, the origins of universe’s existence, and the evolution of the species to where we are today. But evolution is not what really drives us and makes us to want to keep living and persisting through life’s adversities, is it? It is a whole lot more than this. It is what makes us human—our minds, our sense of self-awareness, our ambitions, dreams and goals. So, when you ruminate on your reasons for being, you should actually think along the lines of your values, progress, community, family, and, yes—reproduction.

What Wise Men Through History Believed a Life of Purpose to Be

Before we unpack these elements of meaning, let’s take a step back and see what wise men through history believed a life of purpose to be.((Wikipedia: Meaning of Life))

The Greeks

The ancient Greeks believed in the concept of “eudamonia” which translates as “happiness” or “welfare.” All the great Greek philosophers—Socrates, Plato, Aristotle— believed that the good life means to live in a state of eudaimonia. The interpretations of what it means vary. Some used to think that purpose can be found in acquiring virtues (as self-control, courage, wisdom). Aristotle, for instance, believed that eudaimonia required not only a good character, but taking actions and achieving excellence. Epicurus—another prominent Greek—understood the good life as one of pleasure and freedom from pain and suffering.

Cynicism

The famous Greek school of thought believed that the purpose of life is living a life of Virtue which agrees with Nature. The happy life is the simple one, they taught—free from possessions, rejecting the desires for wealth, possessions, fame or sex. Rather, people should undergo rigorous training and live in a most natural to them way.

Stoicism

The Stoic school of thought, found by Zeno of Citium around 300 B.C. considered the good life to be “living in agreement with nature." Stoicism advocates doing good while staying calm, focusing on what’s important and under our control, not wasting thoughts on what we can't affect. Happiness is:

"found in accepting this moment as it presents itself, by not allowing ourselves to be controlled by our desire for pleasure or our fear of pain, by using our minds to understand the world around us and to do our part in nature's plan, and by working together and treating others fairly and justly.”

Theism

Theists believed in the existence of a deity—a God, who created the universe. Our life’s purpose, then, is aligned with God’s purpose in creating the universe and it is God that gives our lives meaning, purpose and values. Without Him, life will be empty.

Existentialism

According to this 20th century philosophy, supported by famous minds as Søren Kierkegaard, Fyodor Dostoevsky, Jean-Paul Sartre, Friedrich Nietzsche, all human beings have free will. It’s believed that each person gives meaning to their own life, not the society or religion. Therefore, everyone’s purpose is unique and subjective to their circumstances and understanding. Or, simply put, our lives’ meaning is what we decide it to be.

What Creates Meaning for Your Life?

Based on the above brief walk through history, it seems that the interpretation of what infuses our existence with meaning and purpose somewhat varies depending on the historical period and the school of thought. But undeniably, there are still some commonalities and recurring ideas. Our reason for being emerges as something greater than ourselves—such as serving God’s will or contributing to society. At the same time, it’s all nuanced because it’s refracted through our individual prisms. Still, the things that may be good candidates for meaning-creators in our lives can be separated in few main categories, as I wrote recently :

Social

As human beings are social creatures, we have an innate need to connect to others, to be part of a group, to sense that we belong, and that we have someone who cares about us. According to the longest study on happiness and life satisfaction((Ted Ideas: 4 lessons from the longest-running study on happiness))—which spanned over 75 years, the good life lies in the quality of our relationships. “Time with others,” Prof. Waldinger, who led the research tells us, “protects us from the bruises of life’s ups and downs.” But it’s not only our friendships that make life worth living. It’s our families, children, siblings. It’s all the people who we feel love and affection for and who, in turn, give us theirs.

Achievement

Although tying our worth solely to the outcome of our endeavors can create an unstable sense of self-esteem, we still want the net of our successes to outnumber that of our failings. We want to sense that we are moving forward, progressing, realizing our goals. Studies have found that achievements bring greater meaning to our everyday lives.((J Pers.: Relationships between meaning in life, social and achievement events, and positive and negative affect in daily life.)) And it’s not the lure of the limelight or the desire for kudos that will make our existence worthwhile. It’s the recognition of our efforts, the appreciation, the acknowledgement that counts. In other words, we want our actions to matter and make a difference.

Competence, Knowledge and Expertise

These purpose-drivers are closely linked to the concept of achievement. Konrad Lorenz, the Austrian Nobel Prize winner, best known for his principle of attachment, once said:

“Life itself is a process of acquiring knowledge.”

Becoming the best at what we do is a large part of the self-improvement movement today. It’s perhaps most famously expressed in the Japanese notions of kaizen and shokunin. Kaizen is the process of continuous improvement—through leaning and gaining expertise, to better ourselves. It’s a way of life. Shokunin means craftman. And it’s about taking pride in what we do and in ourselves. It’s the drive to become better—personally and professionally.

How to Craft Your Own Meaning of Life

In reality, though, there are many more shades and understandings of a life well-spent than the three categories listed above. Here are some further ideas on where to look for your own sense of purpose and fulfillment.

1. Be aware of what makes you happy

This includes your passions, the desire for connecting to others, for reading, writing, travelling, staying in shape. These activities that you enjoy, although they may not give you The One Meaning of your life, still carry a great potential to make you fulfilled and happy. They are spurs of joy. You can call them mini-meanings, which, over time, may contribute to your bigger goals and purpose. But today, they will still offer you something to look forward to, a reason to wake up in the morning. And who’s to say "no" to this?

2. Reproduction

Evolutionary biology provides us with the very primal reason behind our existence on Earth as humans—to ensure that the human race doesn’t become extinct. That is, meaning comes down to survival and continuance of our kin. In this vein, having children and family is often at or near the top spot when people talk about what makes life worth living. This is also liked to our basic need to belong, to have someone to share our successes with, to have a shoulder to cry on, to care about.

3. Desire to leave a mark in the world

With the realization of the transience of our lives comes a natural desire to create something of value to leave to the world, to matter in some way, to make a difference. We all have the capacity to influence others’ lives—some on a smaller scale than others, true, but regardless—it’s the intention and the actions that matters. You can begin with one small thing—whatever it is that matters to you and build on it. For instance, you like animals. Adopt a puppy—give them a better life. You can also volunteer at your local food shelter, or start separating your garbage to help the planet. It is as Mother Teresa once said:

“We can do no great things, but small things with great love.”

A meaningful life is about caring.

How to Lead a Meaningful Life

1. Be compassionate and care about yourself

Per research by the British National Health Service in 2014, there are five steps we can take to lead more meaningful lives:((British National Health Service: Five steps to mental wellbeing))

• Connect with community and family
• Physical exercise
• Lifelong learning
• Giving to others
• Mindfulness of the world around you.

What these recommendations imply is that what brings sunshine into our lives is finding the ways to care about ourselves and to do what makes us feel good. There is barely a need to convince you of the benefits of giving and meditations—these are well established—to both our physical and mental health. Being kind, compassionate and help others are, indeed, the winning behaviors to an increased longevity, decreased stressed and depression. So that we can also experience life in all its colourfulness.

2. Make yourself useful

According to Darius Foroux —a famous entrepreneur, author and influencer, the meaning of life is not to seek happiness, but to make ourselves useful.((Darius Foroux: The Purpose of Life))

"It comes down to this -- what are you DOING that’s making a difference?”

Rather than seeking happiness and meaning through the material things, we must engage in acts of usefulness—to help and make others happy, to create something.

“The last thing I want is to be on my deathbed and realize there’s zero evidence that I ever existed.”

3. Connect with the world

Another influencer—Alain de Botton, the founder of the famous blog The School of Life, believes that the meaning of life comes down to three activities:((The Book of Life: What Is the Meaning of Life?))

• Communication
• Understanding
• Service

“Some of our most meaningful moments are to do with instances of connection,” he writes, be it to a person, song or a book, for instance. It takes us out of our isolation. Understanding is our ability to make sense of the world. And service is to work on improving others’ lives.

4. Use the PURE model

Finally, Peter Wong—a Canadian existential psychologist, has proposed a model, known as PURE for individuals to discover meaning in their lives:((Peter Wong: Existential Positive Psychology))

• P stands for purpose and having worthy goals.
• U denotes understating—of who we are and of the world around us.
• R means that we have sole responsibility to choose the life we want and to own our actions and their consequences.
• E is the need for evaluation, to ensure we are on track with our goals.

Therefore, as you can summon, there are many avenues you can explore that will bring you a sense of purpose. It’s true that you may sometimes feel that your actions are just a drop in the ocean, that you are too small to make a difference. But it’s not true. Meaning is about bringing out the best in you, about doing good by yourself and others. And if we all commit to the goal of improving ourselves and the world we live in—as cliché as it sounds—and we truly believe it, then collectively—the single drop can grow up to become a wave. Now it's your turn to fill in the blank: There Is More to Life Than ____________

Summing It All Up

The quest for meaning in our lives is perhaps the most important driver behind everything that we do. It’s the reason behind all reasons. Some of the most prominent ways to build your purpose is by creating your own tribe; by striving to become a better version of yourself; by helping and serving others, and by setting goals and striving to achieve them. What makes it challenging to put our finger on what purpose means exactly is that it’s a rather vast concept. It can be interpreted as many things by each one of us. But then, maybe, there is no One and Only Meaning in life. Perhaps a better way to view our purpose and existence is more as a mosaic—each experience, each facet in our lives—family, friends, achievements, recognitions—constitutes a piece. You have to look at it in its totality to be able to say if you are happy with the picture you yourself have painted. Or, perhaps, it is as Viktor Frankl said:

“The meaning of life is to give life meaning.”

And each of us has the freedom to decide on what this is.

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